No hold me
Make it stop
BEHIND HER EYES
Please get well my darling dog,
For you’re the queen that’s always strong,
You’ve saved my life a thousand times,
In every way, from ferocious to sublime,
Your beauty emanates from behind those eyes,
And we share a bond that contains no lies,
I will not let you suffer long,
So hurry and once again be strong.
War not, she said to me,
For blood does not wash away easily,
Conflicts come, crimes committed,
But how then do we rid the rot of sinners?
By speaking out in a voice of truth,
Exposing lust for power is the proof.
I awoke with a start,
The room is so dark,
Who pulled me from slumber,
And left me to wonder?
Against his mother’s breast he lay,
Her voice had soothed the day away,
His soul at peace, his breathing deep,
Her love he would forever keep.
I wake in the night,
What is that light,
It’s incredibly bright,
Peeking under the bathroom door,
I ease the door open,
And see that the moon is hoping,
I’ll stay up and party all night,
In it’s brilliant seductive light.
My mother had a stroke, you see,
And will never be the same for me,
She hears my voice, but cannot see,
Or understand her daughter’s pleas,
To leave this Earth and be with God,
Or get well enough to recognize me,
But either way let her be in peace,
For suffering like this eternally
Seems cruel and useless, don’t you agree?
WOKE IN PEACE
I woke up at peace,
For I got to be,
With my mother again,
She wasn’t gone,
She was waiting for me,
At a bookstore in London,
We talked of this and that,
As we waited for the event to begin,
All was the same as we chatted again,
And I felt her hand in mine.
MY FAITHFUL QUEEN
Who will bring a morning toy,
Dropped at my feet with unbridled joy,
Who will love me & gaze in my eyes,
The love between us has no lies,
Your rich thick coat of caramel,
Where I bury all the unbearable,
Stay a little longer my sublime queen,
Let me ready, as this was unforeseen.
The dreams of grief provide no rest,
Nor relieve the fist in my chest,
My insides ache with the loss of you,
Despite my relief your suffering is through,
I long to hear your voice once more,
So I replay voice mails from long ago.
My mother’s soul is finally at peace,
While I am quite unable to sleep,
She left me only five hours ago,
And my heart’s forgotten how to flow,
It feels like a fist within my chest,
Preventing me from taking a deep, full breath,
I am changed forever now,
She has taken her final bow.
Letters become words,
Words become sentences,
Sentences become paragraphs,
Paragraphs become pages,
Pages become chapters,
Chapters become books,
And books give us hope for a better world.
The life within you begins to stir,
And soon life will become a blur,
Of sleepless nights to no avail,
This new life needing your love full-scale,
But in time your jewel will leave you free,
And you’ll long for the memories that used to be.
WORDS OF PAIN
Like a whip across my face,
Your words inflict pain, trying to debase,
But I’ve learned to survive,
And how to erase,
Your unrepentant fall from grace.
As I think about tomorrow,
I reflect on your words that caused me sorrow,
The last two weeks of tumult and strife,
Were caused by your reckless tongue and bite,
You put me through hell to assuage your uncertainty,
And the resulting pain was not done inadvertently.
The wind blows fiercely across my face,
As the boat steers through this narrow strait,
The rise and fall of the voluminous swells,
Is making me feel severely unwell,
Soon we will pass through this horrific roughness,
And I will believe I have seafaring toughness.
Sometimes a country must fall to its knees,
And smell the earth below it,
Remember the blood spilled to build it,
Ask grace to forgive its sins,
Review the tenets forged as an idea,
Determine if they cause pain,
And if they do, change them,
As before it can rise again,
It must be heal.
MUST LOVE DOGS
The snow and ice pelted my face,
My boots leaving a trail to retrace,
No cars or people anywhere,
No snowplows coming, a total nightmare,
Two miles on these icy roads,
Slipping and sliding, curses flying,
My rescues pups eat a special food,
That both of them had all but chewed,
More was at another place,
Just had to get there without falling on my face,
The deathly white enveloped me,
As I finished my task, I looked to see,
Them waiting at the window, worried,
They barked and then they both came running.
CHEW ME UP
Never fit in
Never checked all the boxes
She must be fake
No one’s that nice
Can’t find a place
Want to belong
Cut me hard
Chew me up
I’m better alone
WALK A MILE
In my shoes, walk a mile,
What you’d find won’t make you smile,
For you’d see what I’ve been through,
And you would want a life anew,
It’s not a life that you would choose
If you walked a mile in my shoes.
Candy scattered on the street,
Colors melting in the scorching heat,
Did it fall out of a child’s bag,
Or cast in anger from a mother’s nag,
Either way the pests rejoice,
For they’ve received a special choice,
Eat now before they’re stuck forever,
Or peck on the flattened sweet, whenever.
She speaks to me in her own special way,
And asks me to make the pain go away,
I rub her belly for some time,
Until she’s asleep in the bed that’s mine,
I can’t bring myself to wake this hound,
For my love for her knows no bounds.
Chorale voices pierce the silence,
The marble floors echo their defiance,
I sit on the pew smelling the incense,
As I ponder the lack of moral sense,
Why don’t we care, why don’t we see,
That those who’ve died never had to be,
The voices rise and fall in a dance,
With the votive flames that flicker askance,
The voices reach a final crescendo,
Making my heart ache from death’s concerto.
Stacks of boxes piled high,
Loaded with evidence of leads gone dry,
Inside are photos of cases gone cold,
Murders unsolved, their loved ones now old,
Once they were someone, alive and well,
The murdered that never got to say farewell.
The tea kettle sits atop the stove,
It rattles and whistles ready to blow,
I grab the handle forgetting it’s hot,
And it slams against the iron wrought,
I curse and yell at my own stupidity,
As the kettle keeps whistling, optimistically.
LOST CHRISTMAS COOKIES
The cookies are lost, the cookies are lost,
My mom’s Christmas package is somewhere in the frost,
To the post office she goes to make her complaint,
A federal case is set up to alleviate her pain,
After digging and searching the cookies are found,
Merry Cookies to all and have fun gaining pounds.
A SILENT CHOIR OF SNOWFLAKES
I am cold,
On the side of the road,
I try to stay out of view,
But often a car will slow,
Realizing I’m homeless and alone
Except for my dog Beau,
He lies across my legs,
And he is warm,
The wind suddenly changes,
I look up at the night sky,
It is brighter and whiter,
As a silent choir of snowflakes
Begins to fall.
I feel lonely,
They sense my sadness,
And wet noses are on my lap,
Their eyes gaze up at mine,
Desperate to make eye contact,
They’re making sure I’m all right,
I pet both their brows and they softly moan,
And I am no longer alone.
BROTHERS IN ARMS
Brothers in arms, we brave the hellfire,
Bombs exploding, raging gunfire,
I feel the burn rip through my chest,
I’m probably dying, but I know I’m blessed,
As through the smoke I see my team,
Risking it all to rescue me.
SUNSET ON THE SEA
And at the last,
After all the storms,
The freighter settled
As did all aboard,
Above deck, they came to see,
The last few moments,
Of the sun not seen.
THE TALLEST HEADSTONE
I lean upon the tallest headstone,
The dead lie beneath me, prone and alone.
I wonder if they feel my presence,
As I gaze upon their final residence.
I think about my life half gone,
And imagine myself under the same lawn.
THE LIGHTS OF PARIS
The lights of Paris,
Shine onto the Seine,
Making me remember when,
We fell in love on holiday,
And remain married to this day.
A COLD RAINY NIGHT
It’s a cold and rainy night,
All the cars seem to have only one headlight,
They look like monsters and creatures driving at me,
When suddenly an ambulance is honking at me,
Lights and sirens force me to the side of the road,
I narrowly miss a tree, I just want to get home,
My dogs are waiting, I can hear their moans,
When I finally pull into the garage, I take a deep breath,
And thank the angels for escaping an accidental death.
Gently out of the brush he grazes,
His reflection in the pond amazes
The sun shines down upon his skin,
Illuminating that he’s is terribly thin
Food’s become scarce on the arid land,
As the days get hotter turning the soil to sand
What will become of this beautiful creature,
As he and others disappear from nature
Humans are to blame for the despair he endures,
Mass extinction making his life insecure.
The murmuration of a thousand pairs of wings,
Five hundred strong, swooping, squawking starlings,
They land on my lawn, performing their migration,
A gesture of defiance and climate-change repudiation.
EARTH’S DYING WORDS
My grief for Earth is quite profound,
No point in crying, I make no sound,
Except for the clicking of my computer keys,
Where I write about her demise, practically on my knees,
In the hope my words will one day find,
The young and old, no longer blind,
Inspired by my writing to overcome,
The damage to Earth, humanity has done.
The path meandered through the forest,
I felt lost longing for a time long past,
By the time I came to the end of the path,
I realized weep no more for what is over,
Only by accepting what is gone,
Could I choose a new path, a different one,
And leave my fears behind.
When countries break,
And cannons roar,
The death that comes,
Reminds us all,
That what you think will never end,
Is gone so quickly, once freedom falls.
He stood on his driveway
With a dog I did not know,
He explained the dog was lost
And had been running to and fro,
He leashed the dog
Getting him out of the street,
And unless he found the owner
I knew this dog he’d keep.
The light through the trees,
Swaying in the wind,
Flickers like a faulty switch,
Or like a candle flame,
The in and out light,
Feels both day and night,
It is just beautiful.
She came up behind me
And tapped me on the shoulder,
I quickly spun around
And looked into the older eyes
Of my first friend in Kindergarten,
As we embraced, time smiled,
And in an instant, I was a child again.
PLEASE DON’T GO
She’s going to die, this I know,
But I can’t prepare myself, no, no, no,
Please stay with me, please don’t go,
My heart is breaking because I love you so,
Life without you, I will not last,
I climb into her bed and hold her,
Until she’s passed.
A friend is facing a loss today,
His father will shortly pass away,
While peace will come and suffering will end,
The grief to come may never mend.
A COMPLACENT BREEZE
I step outside to walk on the lawn,
A breeze caresses, that is way too warm,
Like a seductive mistress, it lifts my hair,
Kissing my neck, I feel so bare,
It’s way too warm for this time of year,
Its sensuality burying my awareness and fear,
I know better than to be lured into this complacent place,
As the Earth warms us in a deadly embrace.
TWO BLACK BALLERINAS
Two black ballerinas in relevé,
Their fists raised high, they had something to say,
Atop a statue made of stone,
Now defaced, they’re not alone,
Words of rage wrap the dancers,
Poised and focused, they came to answer,
Tear it down to the ground,
For their triumph is profound.
THE AMAZON RAINFOREST
Violating laws of tribal rights,
They keep on burning it day and night,
Once protected, now abandoned,
The Amazon rainforest is a lost commandment,
Lining their pockets with more and more gold,
Corporations care not for what they’ve stole.
THE FOREST WHISPERS
As I walk along the path,
The forest whispers,
Leaves rustle, branches sway,
The wind tickles my face,
I sit on a rock, close my eyes,
And just listen to what the forest has to say.